


Insane Crack Deathfic of Dooooom

by arrows (orphan_account)



Category: Marvel, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Crack, Deathfic, Decapitation, Gen, I Don't Even Know, Loki Does What He Wants, Loki discovers tumblr, and a horse mask, because it's Loki, but mostly crack, it's crack, just crack, slightly graphic violence I suppose, trust me - Freeform, what do you expect
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-18
Updated: 2013-01-18
Packaged: 2017-11-26 00:06:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/644395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/arrows
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(Does not actually involve Doom. Sorry.)<br/>Based on a prompt by my friend Kay. Pure crack.<br/>"Me: someone give me a fic prompt i feel like writing something but idk what<br/>Kay: Somebody dies<br/>Kay: A person with a face<br/>Kay: and maybe an arm or two<br/>Kay: and a torso<br/>Kay: I have decided that this certain person shall be wearing a horse mask<br/>Me: I think I can make this work<br/>Kay: Lovely~"<br/>I'm not sorry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Insane Crack Deathfic of Dooooom

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LOKISMOTHERFUCKINGASS](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LOKISMOTHERFUCKINGASS/gifts).



Loki sits in his cell at SHIELD. He's run out of ways to entertain himself, and is using what little magic remains after the battle to make random objects, but even that becomes boring after a while. He magics up an apple (even a god needs food) and uses most of his remaining magic to transport Barton's laptop to him. He goes to Barton's history and clicks the first link. A dark teal screen appears, with a white logo in the corner and boxes with pictures and text going down the screen. He scrolls down for a while, curious at what the mortals have come up with. He notices a recurring theme: a horse mask. Being Loki, he decides he wants one. (Before you ask, the whole horse sex thing was a lie created by Sif after he bested her in a fight. He did like horses. Just not sexually.) He uses up his remaining magic to conjure a horse mask, and when it appears he puts it on and laughs. He cannot see very well through the eyeholes of the mask, so he does not see the figure approach. It is a man, average height, with an ax and wild eyes. The man raises the ax and brings it down, slicing through the mask and cutting Loki's head in two. He then cuts through Loki's neck, sending the two halves rolling across the room. (Well, they don't really roll, they make a squish sound when they hit the ground. You get the picture.) Nicholas Cage laughs maniacally as he walks out of the cell, swinging the ax at his side.


End file.
